That Stuff on Your Head!

Let all things be done decently and in order - 1 Cor 14:40

What is it with Nigerian women in particular and their massive head ties? The thing really annoys me, especially when they wear it to Church. One Sunday I went to Church, there were two women sitting in front of me wearing their head tie; one directly in front of me and the other in front of her. At first it didn't really bother me as it was during praise and worship and we were dancing and moving about so I could still see past their head ties. Then, when praise and worship finished and we all sat down for the preaching and other things, to see past this woman's head tie was a problem. Believe me, I was boiling with annoyance inside of me. I came to Church to receive the word of God and this woman's head tie was blocking it. It's not even like I'm short, I'm tall enough, yet this woman still managed to make sure nobody behind her could see past her head tie!

OK, fine!!

I looked around to see if there were any seats that I could move to. Surprisingly, a Church that normally is not so full and would definitely have seats left, had no seat left! I said to myself, "Devil, you are a big liar! No head tie fashioned against me shall prosper!" I had to bend sideways and stretch my neck in all directions, just to see if I could see past her 'mobile house'. Finally, I managed to see past the woman sitting in front of me, but of course 'Mama d'law' sitting in front of her was wearing an even bigger one in bright pink. If you have ever watched a Nigerian film called 'Akirika' where Ngozi Nwosu wore a massive head tie and had to put it in the boot of the cab she took because she and the head tie couldn't fit in the car while it was still on her head, then you'd know the kind of head tie Mama d'law wore to to church. Till today I'm not too sure of what pastor preached that day because I was so annoyed and I eventually gave up trying to see as my neck and back started to ache. When the pastor is preaching, I like to see who is speaking and his/her body language; it helps me pay attention and understand him/her better (I'm just like that, it may be weird to you but anyway...).

Honestly, I had a strong urge to remove the thing from both their heads by myself. I sat throughout the service staring at the green and brown head tie in front of me. I feel sorry for whoever was sitting behind me as they too probably couldn't see behind the two head ties and my head moving around trying to see past them.

I found it funny and interesting after reading this on a blog that i decided to share because it communicates exactly what i experienced on the grand finale of our women's convention in church too. 

Always, always, always…

"Gratitude turns what we have into enough..."

i

I am thankful for....

• The taxes i pay because it means I am employed.
• The clothes that fits a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat. 
• My shadow who watches  me work because it means I am out in the sunshine.
• The room that has to be arranged, windows that have to be washed and gutters that need fixing because it means I have a home.
• All the complaining I hear about our government because it means we have freedom of speech.
• The lady behind me in church who sings off key because it means that I can hear.
• The huge piles of dishes in the kitchen sink because it means my loved ones are nearby.
• The alarm that goes off in the early morning  hours because it means that I'm alive.

Happy Sunday! Have a great week ahead! *winks*

Letter To A Certified Ata - Wewe

Dear Ata-Wewe,

Don't look too surprised at this, you know yourself. Okay, let me break it down for the "Non-Yoruba-Ata-Wewes".Ata is the generic term for chile pepper among the Yorubas in Nigeria, depending on the type or form of pepper there are other term like Ata gungun, Ata rodo, ata dindin thats all i can remember for now. Am sure you know the importance of pepper in food, now imagine the hazardous effect when it's used in excess. Ata-Wewe is a human sized pepper that is out of proportion. it's mostly in a packaged as a female -woman, lady or girl The white man would call you a "Drama Queen"

Sometimes it seems like your only goal in life is to make other people’s lives miserable.You tends to attack other people (women especially) in a more cutting, evil, manipulative, sarcastic way  that causes a lot of the damage. You are very passionate about how you feels and you communicate this exuberance in a magnified way that can be out-of-proportion to the situation at-hand.

Your other personality characteristics include extreme sensitivity, jumping to negative conclusions, thinking the worst about everything, moody, overreacting, taking things out of context, impulsive, flamboyant,  catastrophic (blowing things out of proportion, dramatizing, complaining, nagging, creating worst-case scenarios and basing your decisions off of these judgments), mind-reading (assuming you know what others are thinking without having the evidence to back it up), black-and-white thinking (thinking in all/nothing and either/or terms), and overgeneralizing (making sweeping judgments about something or someone, using such words as always, never, everybody, and nobody) sly , envious, tricky and the list goes on and on.

Immediately you walk into a room its like there is a sign that says "Caution! Certified Ata-Wewe Ahead". Any one that values his or her sanity avoids you like a plague or he or she'll never have a minute's peace. I can only hope that there is actually a cure for "Ata-Wewe Syndrome". it would really make the world a better place.

                                                                        Most sincerely,
                                                                       Concerned Citizen.

Consequences.....

 "Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich." - Daffy Duck

Do you ever wonder how much different life would be if consequences were more immediate?

Too much meat for dinner? Immediate heart-attack.

Not enough calcium? Turn into a boneless bag of flesh.

How much easier would it make parenting at times?

“Eat your vegetables, or your teeth will fall out before you have a chance to brush them!”

Woot! Instant fear-obedience.

Satan led Ananias and Sapphira "to lie to the Holy Ghost". This means they lied to God. Ananias and Sapphira were singing "I Surrender All," but they were lying. They wanted others to think they were very spiritual but they were just pretending, so God killed them. Can you imagine if God was to strike dead all the religious deceivers in our churches today? It was a shocking experience, but look at the good that followed – "great fear came on all them that heard these things". This fear of God is sadly missing today

Every now and then I will hear some one say they like the God of the New Testament but they do not like the God of the Old Testament. How foolish! The God of the OT is the same God of the NT. "For I am the LORD, I change not". You may be thinking, "How could God kill two Christians?" Just as easily as He can kill two non-Christians! This is God’s universe. God created us. God can do whatever He pleases. We are breathing His air, eating His food, and living on His planet.

If the Spirit of God were working in that way today, what a lot of work there would be for the undertakers! There would not be enough of them in any of our cities to bury those who dropped dead!" So many come up to the altar on Sunday morning but by Sunday afternoon it’s back to their worldly ways.We need to be honest with God, if we haven’t been genuine, we need to get that right today.

Happy Harmattan!

As our people say: onye arachaghi onu ya uguru, ga rachaara ya. If one does not lick his lips, harmattan will lick it for him

Happy Valentines Day! Happy easter! Happy workers day! Happy Democracy Day!  Happy Independence Day!Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! and now "Happy Harmattan!" Lolz. Its been a year and some days since i last posted on this blog - can't even remember what my excuse is sef. Well am back and i hope to stay in touch.

It’s that time of the year when the air is cold and dry. It’s the period of dusty surfaces and dusty feet. It’s the time when taking my bath with cold water is a feat. It’s when my lips become dry and cracked if I lick them too much but I always have the urge to lick them. It’s the time of morning fogs, sunny & windy afternoons - the hot and cold feeling and cold evening breezes. A time to wear the clothes I avoided all year round for fear of sweating. It’s the time when my make-up stays on for a whole day if I wanted; the period when i always have the conversation below:

"I really can't stay baby"
"But baby, it's cold outside"
"I gotta go"
"5 more minutes?"
-Me, and my bed every morning on harmattan days. *Even right now*

It really feels good doing this again!
Gotta go! Geezzzz! Mogbe! I'm already late for work!

Dashed Hope

Ever get tired of being disappointed by people? That's where I'm at right now.

And I'm not talking being disappointed over and over by the same people, no I'm talking about being disappointed by new and different people.

It's making me wonder, is it me? Do I need to stop with the cup half-full everybody starts at 100 outlook? Do I expect too much of people? Am I too open? Too trusting? Not skeptical/cynical enough?

No, seriously. I am tired of giving 100 percent -- or more -- only to get some half-assed effort in return.

Maybe I need to stop giving a damn. Maybe then it will be better.

Days of Little Begining

How do i start? At last! after lots of  suggestions and advice, i have my first post..."do not despises the days of little beginnings" better days are ahead *winks*

I'll embrace the entire journey, gleaning wisdom from each step of the process, and have the courage to take chances. I'm stronger than i think i am. “My” door of opportunity is just down the road. I just need to start walking towards it and walk right in. i can do it (I know i can) – and now i should get going!